ME PREGNANT??!!!

I'm not sure if it has ever occurred to you, but I have always been fascinated by the idea of getting pregnant. I find it miraculous. I know it is natural, but imagine how you would feel like when you focus on the realization that you are having a human being growing inside the very you! This is no simple thing, but a magic.

Because of this, I watch my sister-in-law's belly growing bigger and bigger each day in awe. I would always come sit next to her and put my hands on her bulging abdomen to feel life there! A life this is so eager to break free from the entangling womb to the world outside. My sister-in-law looks beautiful to me despite her fat appearance.

But then....! What if it were me pregnant? Would I go around happily with that load in my belly? Would I still look at it in awe? Well, I really doubt whether my perception above will remain the same when that time comes.

Hips don't lie!

Out of the blue, the bustling traffic around me started to swirl and in the next minute, I found my feet feeling the hard ground of the street so familiar to me. The night was cool with December air and beautified by the seemingly-dancing stars above--as if they were also partying with the people down here.

The entire street was packed with expatriates and I could hardly see any local among the crowd. Then, there came this group of smiling youths, one of whom was me trailing behind and laughing rather stupidly. The group actually skidded to a halt before the sight in front of them, obviously not expecting what they were about to experience in any minute. I later followed them as they made their way through the crowd of males and females moving their bodies to the blarring music from the bars on both sides. In shame, I closed my eyes when I saw myselft stopped, along our way to the restaurant at the other end, and started dancing with my other friends. I remember wishing that we hadn't had to move on because the music was extremely tempting and almost irresistable.

In half an hour or so, I found the group returning back from their short break and they all looked wild. I saw me and my friends dancing with as many styles as we could think of while this couple friends of ours stood watching and beaming at us with you-guys-dance-and-we-stare looks. I recall squealing with joy once "Hips don't lie" bursted out from the speaker somewhere and rocked through the night air. Oh, how fun and memorable it was then!

I continued to stand and watch us enjoying ourselves with the music when suddenly, a car honk caught my ears and brought me back to the traffic light near Lux Cinema. It had turned to green light now and the driver behind my moped was bursting to move on. I found myself saying, "Well, it's not my fault. Blame "Hips don't lie" that is being played by the Lux Beauty Salon there.!" Because of the song, memories of the trip my friends and I had in Siem Reap came flooding back............

Desperate calls

I once convinced myself that it was no way necessary to build a house in here because I had the "real" house of family and friends to share all my thoughts with. I have always preferred and will continue to prefer face-to-face communication which i find very interesting--observing your conversation partner's eye movements, lip movements, gestures, facial expressions and so on. But, recently, things haven't been the same.

Both my parents are away from home and worse, my friends and I are thrown by "life" onto our separate ways, seeking for a niche once in a while to breathe as the storm is raging outside! I have never felt so left-out like this before and I just can't find the exact words to best describe it. It feels like.............(well, as I have put it earlier, it is no-word-describing.

So, now in desperate calls, I am here--so new to this electronic world-- to pour in my everyday stories of life and, if any, love.

To be continued...........